not to be bitter or anything but like. why do parents always try to make you feel like you should be grateful to have a roof over your head and food on your plate.
like.
7 year old me: asks for a toy or somethin
mom: i already give you a place to sleep and food to eat, you should be grateful for what you have
7 yr old me: oh okay….
me now, 17 and jaded: those are the simple necessities needed for a child to live comfortably, healthily, and happily and you providing those things is not optional. you willingly decided to have children and willingly accepted the responsibilities that come with the job. you telling a child to be grateful for the fact that you do the Bare Minimum by allow them to Live Decently is by nature manipulative and you should feel bad
im not really even mad at my mother, because when i actually Said all this to her, she didn’t look angry just. surprised. like it had never even occurred to her. and it was so obvious in that moment that she’d been told those same things as a child herself.
it just goes to show how toxic parenting like that needs to be noticed and discussed and then discarded so it doesn’t keep spreading. shit like that is why i never asked for anything as a little kid and its why i still feel bad about buying/asking for things just because i want them. shit like that is why i struggle to ask for help when I get stressed out and im only just now unlearning that behavior.
its so so important to be aware of what and how you say things to kids because it really can ruin them in the long run